"ummmm....soooo write back...or mass email peeps...cuz some of us need that right now. many thanks."
-the klc

How can I say no to a friend in need?

It's been a while since my last mass of an email. I apologize. I know for some of you it hasn't been easy. For those new to the mass email experience, I welcome you. I hope you will find this to not only be an enjoyable experience, but (if I'm doing my job right) also an enlightening one.

I got much to talk about this week, so let's just jump into things:

As some of you know, I recently parted ways from my long time friend/rival Ben Granoff. I am now currently residing in a section of Manhattan that some refer to as "Chelsea." Although you may be more familiar with its more common name of "Gaytopia." My building is part of the Penn South coop living area, which means that I reside among the elderly. The average age in my apartment complex is roughly 98, which is great for me...cuz that makes me the stud of the building! I can't walk through the hallways for five seconds without getting my cheeks pinched (and I ain't talkin about the ones on my face!)

I must say that I was a little apprehensive about living alone at first. I've never done it before. It's bizarre how quiet the apartment gets at night (especially without TV or internet), but although there are some cons I have discovered that there are also many pros.
Examples:

1) I can masturbate wherever/whenever I want. I don't know about you ladies, but I'm sure every guy out there will agree with me that it's pretty sweet. No more of that pesky paranoia...although the guilt factor still resides. Also, I've learned how to double task my masturbating with other useful activities, for example, cook/masturbate, put away the dishes/masturbate, swiff the floor/touch myself. All in all this technique has been a real time saver. For those of you who are living alone, I highly recommend it.

...you know it's funny, I was gonna make a whole list that stated the pros of living alone, but now that I think about it, I think there may only be one. Either way though, it's a good one.

WAIT, I thought of another one! Showering with the door open...It keeps the mirror from fogging up.

Well, that's pretty much all I got as far as news goes. Oh, I started conditioning my hair recently...it's going ok.

...yep, I think that's everything. Feel free to write back. I'm bored as butt over here (I'm currently working on Arizona...only 400 more dots to go!)

Your confidant,